What's the Skinny

What is it with pants and trousers these days. Super skinny, ultra skinny, super ultra skinny. I mean half the time I can't even get my foot in the damn things let alone the rest of my leg. Whatever happened to regular sizing? And speaking of sizing, why is it that sizing’s are different from manufacturer to manufacturer.



A 30 inch waist is a 30 inch waist (ok clearly not referring to me there but you get the point). Why label something as a certain size but then inform your customer you need to buy a size up or even two sizes up because the sizing is "on the small side". I mean what the hell does that even mean? Aren't all tape measures equal? isn't an inch or a centimetre the same the world over?

Some of us are graced with muscular thighs, we can't wear skinny or ultra-ultra skinny simply because our legs won't fit into the damn things. Or when we do manage to eventually squeeze into a pair we either end up with a severe case of camel toe or look like we are advertising for a screen test in a porno movie. I mean some trousers leave nothing to the imagination and I am certainly not going to do a drag queen tuck to fit into a pair.

Which of course begs the question for those that do wear them, either they're a total exhibitionist or ...... and trail off there leaving the rest of that statement to your imagination. But seriously, trying on a pair at times is almost like a full body work out. In fact throw that gym membership away and simply go trouser shopping, you might never fit into a pair but after a couple of months trying you'll certainly reap the rewards, and it's free!

But seriously, now that these ridiculous sizing’s have more or less become the norm, shopping for something that actually fits is a challenge. Don't get me wrong, these trousers look good on some people, on others they look like their legs are made of matchsticks and leave you wondering how the hell they can even walk without suffering a serious injury. And don't get me started on visible panty lines again because on some people the effect is well, quite frankly, disturbing to say the least.

They are simply not for me, apart from the struggle to even get into a pair, I actually don't want to wear a pair of trousers that look like they have been spray painted on, with pockets that are more for visual effect rather than functionality because there's simply not a chance in hell you will ever get your hand into some of them. But they are every where now and seem to be the "only" style available which of course is bad news for people like me who have been blessed with big bones, muscular thighs, not to mention some of God's other gifts. It's simply not me, personal taste and all that.

I think I am going to have to search for a decent tailor who can make a simple regular fit trouser, with a slightly tapered leg that don't give me a hernia when I sit down or bend over, and one made using a normal tape measure when it comes to it. In the meantime, I'll simply pray to God that this trend of tight fitting (or ill-fitting in some cases) trousers gives way to something more sensible. Although having said that I have visions (or nightmares) that the next trend will be the complete opposite and baggy will be back in, although thankfully we seem to have passed through the "show off your underway" phase already so there is hope, slim as it may be (and yes pun intended).

UPDATE 30th December 2021
Seems I'm not alone, thankfully. Read more HERE

Facebook Twitter Whatsapp Line